Bookstand Class

I recently attended a Bookstand Class at Lone Star College. I learned how to make a bookstand and so I'm posting some pictures from the class along with the one I made. It can be useful for holding a recipe book, copy next to a computer or just hold a book. I found the picture at the scrapbook store. It was one piece, so that made it easy to put on the stand and then finish with Mod Podge. There can be many kinds of themes depending on where one wants to use it. If anyone would like to have a bookstand I'll do the class again in the Spring and make one for you with whatever theme, color, etc. you would like on it.

A Mouse Story

 

A mouse looked through the crack in the wall

To see the farmer and his wife open a package.

“What food might this contain?”

The mouse wondered.

He was devastated to discover it was a mousetrap.

 

Retreating to the farmyard,

The mouse proclaimed this warning:

“There is a mousetrap in the house!

There is a mousetrap in the house!”

 

The chicken clucked and scratched,

Raised her head and said, “Mr. Mouse,

I can tell you this is a grave concern to you,

But it is of no consequence to me.

I cannot be bothered by it.”

 

The mouse turned to the pig and told him,

“There is a mousetrap in the house!

“There is a mousetrap in the house!”

 

The pig sympathized, but said,

“I am so very sorry, Mr. Mouse,

But there is nothing I can do about it.

Be assured you are in my prayers.”

 

The mouse turned to the cow and said,

“There is a mousetrap in the house!

“There is a mousetrap in the house!”

 

The cow said, “Wow, Mr. Mouse,

I’m sorry for you,

But it’s no skin off my nose.”

 

So, the mouse returned to the house,

Head down and dejected,

To face the farmer’s mousetrap… Alone…

That very night

A sound was heard throughout the house

… the sound of a mousetrap catching its prey

 

The farmer’s wife rushed to see what was caught.

In the darkness, she did not see it.

It was a venomous snake

Whose tail was caught in the trap.

The snake bit the farmer’s wife.

 

The farmer rushed her to the hospital.

When she returned home she still had a fever.

Everyone knows you treat a fever… With fresh chicken soup.

 

So, the farmer took his hatchet to the farmyard

For the soup’s main ingredient.

 

But his wife’s sickness continued.

Friends and neighbors

Came to sit with her around the clock.

 

To feed them,

The farmer butchered the pig.

But, alas, The farmer’s wife did not get well…

She died.

 

So many people came for her funeral

That the farmer had the cow slaughtered.

To provide enough meat for all of them

For the funeral luncheon.

 

And the mouse looked upon it all

From his crack in the wall with great sadness.

 

So, next time you hear

Someone is facing a problem

And you think it doesn’t concern you,

Remember…

When one of us is threatened, we are all at risk.

We are all involved in this journey called life.

We must keep an eye out for one another

And make an extra effort

To encourage one another.

To do the right thing.

And be all we can be with kindness & compassion.

A story from a church newsletter.

IDIOT SIGHTINGS!

IDIOT SIGHTING We had to have the garage door repaired.  The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.  I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.  He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower."  I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4.  He said, "NO, it's not. Four is larger than two..." We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill.  Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.  She said, "You gave me too much money."  I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request.  I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said "We're sorry but we cannot do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.  
   
IDIOT SIGHTING:
I live in a semi-rural area.  We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here!  I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."
From Kingman, KS .

IDIOT  SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco.  She asked the person behind the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'  He said he was sorry, but they only had iceberg lettuce.  From Kansas City.  

IDIOT SIGHTING:
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, "Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?" To which I replied, "If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?" He smiled knowingly and nodded, "That's why we ask."
Happened in Birmingham,   Ala.      

IDIOT SIGHTING
The stop-light on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street.   I was crossing with an intellectually challenged co-worker of mine.  She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for.  I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red.  Appalled, she responded, "What on earth are blind people doing driving? She was a probation officer in  Wichita, KS.

IDIOT SIGHTING:
I attended a "good-bye" luncheon for an old and dear co-worker.  She was leaving the company due to 'downsizing.' Our manager commented cheerfully, "This is fun.  We should do this more often." Not another word was spoken.  We all just looked at each other with that "deer-in-the-headlights" stare. This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.    

IDIOT SIGHTING:
I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.  A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriff's office, no less.  

IDIOT SIGHTING:
When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door.  As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked.  "Hey," I announced to the technician, "It's open!"  His reply, "I know.   I already got that side." This was at the Ford dealership in Canton, MS.

IDIOT SIGHTING
When I left Hawaii and was transferred to FL, I still had the Hawaiian plates on my car, as my car was shipped from Hawaii. I was parking somewhere (I can't remember) and a guy asked me "Wow, you drove from Hawaii  to here?" I looked at him and quickly said "Yep. I took the Hawaii/San Francisco Bridge." He nodded his head and said "Cool!"

STAY ALERT!  
They walk among us... and they VOTE... and they REPRODUCE... 

Something To Ponder...

Someone has written these beautiful words. One must read and try to understand the deep meanings in them. They are like the Ten Commandments to follow in life all the time.


1.  Prayer is not a "spare wheel" that you pull out when in trouble; it is a "steering wheel" that directs us in the right path throughout life.

2.  Do you know why a car's WINDSHIELD is so large and the rear view mirror is so small? Because our PAST is not as important as our FUTURE. So, look ahead and move on. 

3.  Friendship is like a BOOK. It takes few seconds to burn, but it takes years to write. 

4.  All things in life are temporary.  If going well enjoy it, they will not last forever. If going wrong don’t worry, they can't last long either. 

5.  Old friends are like Gold! New friends are Diamonds! If you get a Diamond, don't forget the Gold! Because to hold a Diamond, you always need a base of Gold! 

6.   Often when we lose hope and think this is the end, GOD smiles from above and says, "Relax, sweetheart, it's just a bend, not the end! 

7.  When GOD solves your problems, you have faith in HIS abilities; when GOD doesn't solve your problems HE has faith in your abilities. 

8.  A blind person asked St. Anthony: "Can there be anything  worse than losing eye sight?" He replied: "Yes, losing your vision." 

9.  When you pray for others, God listens to you and blesses them; and sometimes, when you are safe and happy, remember that someone has prayed for you.

10.  WORRYING does not take away tomorrow's TROUBLES; it takes away today’s PEACE.

2011... The Year of the Money!

This year, July has 5 Fridays, 5 Saturdays and 5 Sundays. This happens
once every 823 years. This is called money bags.

Kinda interesting - read on!!!

This year we're going to experience four unusual dates.

1/1/11, 1/11/11, 11/1/11, 11/11/11 and that's not all...

Take the last two digits of the year in which you were born - now add
the age you will be this year,

The results will be 2011 for everyone in whole world. This is the year of
the Money!!!

Why God Made Moms

Answers given by 2nd grade school children to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?
1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.
2. Mostly to clean the house.
3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.
2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.
3. God made my mom just the same like he made me. He just used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.
2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then they mostly use string, I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?

1. We're related.
2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's mom like me.

What kind of a little girl was your mom?

1. My mom has always been my mom and none of that other stuff.
2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess would be pretty bossy.
3. They say she used to be nice.

What did your mom need to know about your dad before she married him?

1. His last name.
2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook? Does he get drunk on beer?
3. Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?

1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my mom eats a lot
2. She got too old to do anything else with him.
3. My grandma says that mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?

1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because dad's such a goof ball.
2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the stuff under the bed.
3. I guess mom is, but only because she has a lot more to do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?

1. Moms work at work and work at home and dads just go to work at work.
2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring them.
3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your friends.
4. Moms have magic, they make you feel better without medicine..

What does your mom do in her spare time?

1. Mothers don't do spare time.
2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think some kind of plastic surgery.
2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd diet, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it be?

1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room clean. I'd get rid of that.
2. I'd make my mom smarter. Then she would know it was my sister who did it not me.
3. I would like for her to get rid of those invisible eyes on the back of her head.

Just A Mom?

 

A woman, renewing her driver's license, was asked by the woman at Registry to state her occupation. She hesitated, uncertain how to classify herself.  'What I mean is, ' explained the woman at Registry, 'do you have a job or are you just a ....?'  'Of course I have a job,' snapped the woman. 'I'm a Mom.' 'We don't list 'Mom' as an occupation, 'housewife' covers it,' Said the recorder emphatically.

I forgot all about her story until one day I found myself  in the same situation.

The Clerk was obviously a career woman, poised, efficient, and possessed of a high sounding title like, 'Official Interrogator' or 'City Registrar.' 'What is your occupation?' she probed. What made me say it? I do not know. The words simply popped out. 'I'm a Research Associate in the field of Child Development and Human Relations.'

The clerk paused, ball-point pen frozen in midair and looked up as though she had not heard right. I repeated the title slowly emphasizing the most significant words. Then I stared with wonder as my pronouncement was written, in bold, black ink on the official questionnaire. 'Might I ask,' said the clerk with new interest, 'just what you do in your field?'

Coolly, without any trace of fluster in my voice, I heard myself reply, 'I have a continuing program of research, (what mother doesn't) In the laboratory and in the field, (normally I would have said indoors and out). I'm working for my Masters, (first the Lord and then the whole family) and already have four credits (all daughters).

Of course, the job is one of the most demanding in the humanities, (any mother care to disagree?) ….. and I often work 14 hours a day, (24 is more like it). But the job is more challenging than most run-of-the-mill careers and the rewards are more of a satisfaction rather than just money.'

There was an increasing note of respect in the clerk's voice as she completed the form, stood up and personally ushered me to the door. As I drove into our driveway, buoyed up by my glamorous new career, I was greeted by my lab assistants -- ages 13, 7, and 3. Upstairs I could hear our new experimental model, (a 6 month old baby) in the child development program, testing out a new vocal pattern.

I felt I had scored a beat on bureaucracy! And I had gone on the official records as someone more distinguished and indispensable to mankind than 'just another Mom.'

Motherhood!
What a glorious career!
Especially when there's a title on the door.

Does this make Grandmothers 'Senior Research associates in the field of Child Development and Human Relations' And Great Grandmothers 'Executive Senior Research Associates? I think so! I also think it makes Aunts Associate Research Assistants.'

Nifty After Fifty

 

I've been doing this program now for about four months. I go twice a week and work out on the various machines. I was evaluated to begin with and then after 3 months evaluated again.... and it really seems to be helping in my balance and arthritis. It is also part of my TexanPlus Health coverage plan. So, no extra cost, so far!

 + + + + +  WINERY TOUR AND LUNCH WITH THE SENIORS + + + + + 

After I exercised on Thursday I drove to Waller, TX and joined my Senior friends from church and toured the Colony Cellars Winery and learned how grapes grow in Texas. After the tour we had lunch at the Thirsty Parrot in Monaville, TX. It was a great outing with friends.

GOD'S ROSE

A new minister was walking with an older, more seasoned minister in the garden one day.

Feeling a bit insecure about what God had for him to do, he was asking the older preacher for some advice.

The older preacher walked up to a rosebush and handed the young preacher a rosebud and told him to open it without tearing off any petals.

The young preacher looked in disbelief at the older preacher and was trying to figure out what a rosebud could possibly have to do with his wanting to know the will of God for his life and ministry.

But because of his great respect for the older preacher, he proceeded to try to unfold the rose, while keeping every petal intact.

It wasn't long before he realized how impossible this was to do.

Noticing the younger preacher's inability to unfold the rosebud without tearing it, the older preacher began to recite the following poem....

"It is only a tiny rosebud,

A flower of God's design;

But I cannot unfold the petals

With these clumsy hands of mine."

"The secret of unfolding flowers

Is not known to such as I.

GOD opens this flower so easily,

But in my hands they die."

"If I cannot unfold a rosebud,

This flower of God's design,

Then how can I have the wisdom

To unfold this life of mine?"

"So I'll trust in God for leading

Each moment of my day.

I will look to God for guidance

In each step of the way."

"The path that lies before me,

Only my Lord knows.

I'll trust God to unfold the moments,

Just as He unfolds the rose."

This is a reminder to let go

and let God unfold your life.

A Quiz for People Who Know Everything!

I found out in a hurry that I didn't. These are not trick questions. They are straight questions with straight answers.

1. Name the one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends.
2. What famous North American landmark is constantly moving backward?
3. Of all vegetables, only two can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons. All other vegetables must be replanted every year. What are the only two perennial vegetables?
4. What fruit has its seeds on the outside?
5. In many liquor stores, you can buy pear brandy, with a real pear inside the bottle. The pear is whole and ripe, and the bottle is genuine, it hasn't been cut in any way. How did the pear get inside the bottle?
6. Only three words in standard English begin with the letters "dw" and they are all common words. Name two of them.
7. There are 14 punctuation marks in English grammar. Can you name at least half of them?
8. Name the only vegetable or fruit that is never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form except fresh.
9. Name 6 or more things that you can wear on your feet beginning with the letter "S".


Answers To Quiz:
1.. The one sport in which neither the spectators nor the participants know the score or the leader until the contest ends........ Boxing
2. North American landmark constantly moving backward............ Niagara Falls (The rim is worn down about two and a half feet each year because of the millions of gallons of water that rush over it every minute.)
3. Only two vegetables that can live to produce on their own for several growing seasons....... Asparagus and Rhubarb.
4. The fruit with its seeds on the outside........... Strawberry.
5. How did the pear get inside the brandy bottle?........... It grew inside the bottle. The bottles are placed over pear buds when they are small, and are wired in place on the tree. The bottle is left in place for the entire growing season. When the 20 pears are ripe, they are snipped off at the stems.
6. Three English words beginning with dew........... Dwarf, dwell and dwindle. (Isn't "Dweeb" a word?)
7. Fourteen punctuation marks in English grammar.......... Period, comma, colon, semicolon, dash, hyphen, apostrophe, question mark, exclamation point, quotation mark, brackets, parenthesis, braces, and ellipses.
8. The only vegetable or fruit never sold frozen, canned, processed, cooked, or in any other form but fresh......... Lettuce.
9. Six or more things you can wear on your feet beginning with "S".......... Shoes, socks, sandals, sneakers, slippers, skis, skates, snowshoes, stockings, stilts.

BIBLE BOOK REPORT

A child was asked to write a book report on the entire Bible.
This is amazing and brought tears of laughter to my eyes.I wonder how often we take for granted that children understand what we are teaching???

Through the eyes of a child:

The Children's Bible in a Nutshell.
In the beginning, which occurred near the start, there was nothing but God, darkness, and some gas. The Bible says, 'The Lord thy God is one,’ but I think He must be a lot older than that.

Anyway, God said, 'Give me a light!' and someone did.

Then God made the world.

He split the Adam and made Eve. Adam and Eve were naked, but they weren't embarrassed because mirrors hadn't been invented yet.

Adam and Eve disobeyed God by eating one bad apple, so they were driven from the Garden of Eden.... Not sure what they were driven in though, because they didn't have cars.

Adam and Eve had a son, Cain, who hated his brother as long as he was Abel.

Pretty soon all of the early people died off, except for Methuselah, who lived to be like a million or something.

One of the next important people was Noah, who was a good guy, but one of his kids was kind of a Ham. Noah built a large boat and put his family and some animals on it. He asked some other people to
join him, but they said they would have to take a rain check.

After Noah came Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob. Jacob was more famous than his brother, Esau, because Esau sold Jacob his birthmark in exchange for some pot roast. Jacob had a son named Joseph who wore a
really loud sports coat.

Another important Bible guy is Moses, whose real name was Charlton Heston. Moses led the Israel Lights out of Egypt and away from the evil Pharaoh after God sent ten plagues on Pharaoh's people. These
plagues included frogs, mice, lice, bowels, and no cable.

God fed the Israel Lights every day with manicotti. Then he gave them His Top Ten Commandments. These include: don't lie, cheat, smoke, dance, or covet your neighbor's stuff. Oh, yeah, I just thought of one more: Humor thy father and thy mother.

One of Moses' best helpers was Joshua who was the first Bible guy to use spies. Joshua fought the battle of Geritol and the fence fell over on the town.

After Joshua came David. He got to be king by killing a giant with a slingshot. He had a son named Solomon who had about 300 wives and 500 porcupines. My teacher says he was wise, but that doesn't sound very wise to me.

After Solomon there were a bunch of major league prophets. One of these was Jonah, who was swallowed by a big whale and then barfed up on the shore.

There were also some minor league prophets, but I guess we don't have to worry about them.

After the Old Testament came the New Testament. Jesus is the star of The New. He was born in Bethlehem in a barn. (I wish I had been born in a barn too, because my mom is always saying to me, 'Close the door! Were you born in a barn?' It would be nice to say, 'As a matter of fact, I was.')

During His life, Jesus had many arguments with sinners like the Pharisees and the Democrats.

Jesus also had twelve opossums. The worst one was Judas Asparagus. Judas was so evil that they named a terrible vegetable after him.

Jesus was a great man. He healed many leopards and even preached to some Germans on the Mount.

But all those guys put Jesus on trial before Pontius the Pilot. Pilot didn't stick up for Jesus. He just washed his hands instead.

Anyways, Jesus died for our sins, then came back to life again. He went up to Heaven but will be back at the end of the Aluminum. His return is foretold in the book of Revolution.

TEXAS

Here is what Jeff Foxworthy has to say about folks from Texas ...

If someone in a Lowe's store offers you assistance and they don't work there, you may live in Texas ;

If you've worn shorts and a parka at the same time, you may live in Texas ;

If you've had a lengthy telephone conversation with someone who dialed a wrong number, you may live in Texas ;

If 'Vacation' means going anywhere south of Dallas for the weekend, you may live in Texas ;

If you measure distance in hours, you may live in Texas ;

If you know several people who have hit a deer more than once, you may live in Texas ;

If you install security lights on your house and garage, but leave both unlocked, you may live in Texas ;

If you carry jumper cables in your car and your wife knows how to use them, you may live in Texas;

If the speed limit on the highway is 55 mph --you're going 80 and everybody's passing you, you may live in Texas;

If you find 60 degrees 'a little chilly,' you may live in Texas;

I actually understand most of these jokes, and wanted to share them, because I definitely live in Texas.

Here are some little known, very interesting facts about Texas.

1. Beaumont to El Paso: 742 miles.

2. Beaumont to Chicago: 770 miles.

3. El Paso is closer to California than to Dallas.

4. World's first rodeo was in Pecos, July 4, 1883.

5. The Flagship Hotel in Galveston is the only hotel in North America built over water.

Destroyed by Hurricane Ike in 2008!

6. The Heisman Trophy was named after John William Heisman who was the first full-time

coach at Rice University in Houston.

7. Brazoria County has more species of birds than any other area in North America.

8. Aransas Wildlife Refuge is the winter home of North America’s only

remaining flock of whooping cranes.

9. Jalapeno jelly originated in Lake Jackson in 1978.

10. The worst natural disaster in U.S. history was in 1900, caused by a hurricane,

 in which over 8,000 lives were lost on Galveston Island.

11. The first word spoken from the moon, July 20, 1969 was "Houston,"

but the space center was actually in Clear Lake City at the time.

12. King Ranch in South Texas is larger than Rhode Island ...

13. Tropical Storm Claudette brought a U.S. rainfall record of 43" in 24 hours in

and around Alvin in July of 1979.

14. Texas is the only state to enter the U.S. by TREATY, (known as the Constitution of 1845

by the Republic of Texas to enter the Union) instead of by annexation.

This allows the Texas Flag to fly at the same height as the U.S. Flag, and may divide into 5 states.

15. A Live Oak tree near Fulton is estimated to be 1500 years old.

16. Caddo Lake is the only natural lake in the state.

17. Dr Pepper was invented in Waco in 1885. There is no period in Dr Pepper...

18. Texas has had six capital cities:

Washington-on-the Brazos, Harrisburg, Galveston, Velasco, West Columbia and Austin.

19. The Capitol Dome in Austin is the only dome in the U. S. which is taller than the

Capitol Building in Washington DC (by 7 feet).

20. The San Jacinto Monument is the tallest free standing monument in the world and

it is taller than the Washington monument.

21. The name ' Texas ' comes from the Hasini Indian word 'tejas' meaning friends.

Tejas is not Spanish for Texas.

22. The State Mascot is the Armadillo. (An interesting bit of trivia about the armadillo is

they always have four babies. They have one egg, which splits into four,

and they either have four males or four females.)

23. The first domed stadium in the U.S. was the Astrodome in Houston.

Cowboy's Ten Commandments posted on the wall at Cross Trails Church in Fairlie, Texas:

(1) Just one God.

(2) Honor yer Ma & Pa.

(3) No telling tales or gossipin'.
(4) Git yourself to Sunday meeting.

(5) Put nothin' before God.

(6) No foolin' around with another fellow's gal.

(7) No killin'.

(8) Watch yer mouth.

(9) Don't take what ain't yers.

(10) Don't be hankerin' for yer buddy's stuff.

Y'all git that?

============================================

TEXAS HAS IT ALL

Feeling a little Down? Why not Visit…

Smiley, Texas

Paradise, Texas

Rainbow , Texas

Sweet Home , Texas

Comfort , Texas

Friendship, Texas

Love the Sun?

Sun City, Texas

Sunrise, Texas

Sunset, Texas

Sundown, Texas

Sunray, Texas

Sunny Side, Texas

Want something to eat?

Bacon, Texas

Noodle, Texas

Oatmeal, Texas

Turkey, Texas

Trout, Texas

Sugar Land, Texas

Salty, Texas

Rice, Texas

Pearland, Texas

Orange, Texas

And top it off with:

Sweetwater, Texas

Why travel to other cities? Texas has them all!

Detroit, Texas

Buffalo, Texas

Cleveland, Texas

Colorado City, Texas

Denver City, Texas

Klondike, Texas

Nevada, Texas

Memphis, Texas

Miami, Texas

Boston, Texas

Santa Fe, Texas

Tennessee Colony, Texas

Reno, Texas

Pasadena, Texas

Columbus, Texas

Feel like traveling outside the country?

Athens, Texas

Canadian, Texas

China, Texas

Egypt, Texas

Ireland, Texas

Italy, Texas

Turkey, Texas

London, Texas

New London, Texas

Paris, Texas

Palestine, Texas

No need to travel to Washington D.C.

Whitehouse, Texas

There's even a city named after our planet!

Earth, Texas

And a city named after the state...

Texas City, Texas

Exhausted?

Energy, Texas

Pep, Texas

Cold?

Blanket, Texas

Winters, Texas

Like to read about History?

Santa Anna, Texas

Goliad, Texas

Alamo, Texas

Gun Barrel City, Texas

Robert Lee, Texas

Need Office Supplies?

Staples, Texas

Want to go into outer space?

Venus, Texas
Mars, Texas

You guessed it. It's on the state line...

Texline, Texas

For the kids...

Kermit, Texas
Elmo, Texas

Nemo, Texas
Tarzan, Texas

Winnie, Texas

Sylvester, Texas

Other city names in Texas, to make you smile.....

Frognot, Texas

Bigfoot, Texas

Hogeye, Texas

Cactus, Texas
Notrees, Texas
Best, Texas
Veribest, Texas
Kickapoo, Texas
Dime Box, Texas
Old Dime Box, Texas
Telephone, Texas
Telegraph, Texas
Whiteface, Texas
Twitty, Texas

And the favorites...

Cut 'n' Shoot, Texas

Gun Barrell City, Texas

Hoop And Holler, Texas

Ding Dong, Texas and,

of course,

Muleshoe, Texas

First Grade Wisdom

The 1st grade school teacher had twenty-six students in her class. She presented each child in her classroom the 1st half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. It's hard to believe these were actually done by first graders. Their insight may surprise you. While reading, keep in mind that these are first-graders, 6-year-olds, because the last one is a classic!

1. Don't change horses until they stop running.

2. Strike while the bug is close.

3. It's always darkest before Daylight Saving Time.

4. Never underestimate the power of termites.

5. You can lead a horse to water but How?

6. Don't bite the hand that looks dirty.

7. No news is impossible

8. A miss is as good as a Mr.

9. You can't teach an old dog new Math

10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll stink in the morning.

11. Love all, trust Me.

12. The pen is mightier than the pigs.

13. An idle mind is the best way to relax.

14. Where there's smoke there's pollution.

15. Happy the bride who gets all the presents.

16. A penny saved is not much.

17. Two's company, three's the Musketeers.

18. Don't put off till tomorrow what you put on to go to bed.

19. Laugh and the whole world laughs with you, cry and You have to blow your nose.

20. There are none so blind as Stevie Wonder.

21. Children should be seen and not spanked or grounded.

22. If at first you don't succeed get new batteries.

23. You get out of something only what you See in the picture on the box

24. When the blind lead the blind get out of the way.

25. A bird in the hand is going to poop on you.

And the WINNER and last one!

26. Better late than Pregnant

Why Did Jesus Fold the Napkin?

Why did Jesus fold the linen burial cloth after His resurrection? I never noticed this.....

The Gospel of John (20:7) tells us that the napkin, which was placed over the face of Jesus, was not just thrown aside like the grave clothes..

The Bible takes an entire verse to tell us that the napkin was neatly folded, and was placed at the head of that stony coffin.

Early Sunday morning, while it was still dark, Mary Magdalene came to the tomb and found that the stone had been rolled away from the entrance.

She ran and found Simon Peter and the other disciple, the one whom Jesus loved. She said, 'They have taken the Lord's body out of the tomb, and I don't know where they have put him!'

Peter and the other disciple ran to the tomb to see. The other disciple out ran Peter and got there first. He stopped and looked in and saw the linen cloth lying there, but he didn't go in.

Then Simon Peter arrived and went inside. He also noticed the linen wrappings lying there, while the cloth that had covered Jesus' head was folded up and lying to the side.

Was that important? Absolutely!
Is it really significant? Yes!

In order to understand the significance of the folded napkin, you have to understand a little bit about Hebrew tradition of that day.

The folded napkin had to do with the Master and Servant, and every Jewish boy knew this tradition.

When the servant set the dinner table for the master, he made sure that it was exactly the way the master wanted it.

The table was furnished perfectly, and then the servant would wait, just out of sight, until the master had finished eating, and the servant would not dare touch that table, until the master was finished..

Now if the master were done eating, he would rise from the table, wipe his fingers, his mouth, and clean his beard, and would wad up that napkin and toss it onto the table.

The servant would then know to clear the table. For in those days, the wadded napkin meant, "I'm finished.."

But if the master got up from the table, and folded his napkin, and laid it beside his plate, the servant would not dare touch the table, because..........

The folded napkin meant,

"I'm coming back!"

Grandparents and Grandchildren

For a few smiles today! 

1. I was in the bathroom, putting on my makeup, under the watchful eyes of my young granddaughter, as I'd done many times before. After I applied my lipstick and started to leave, the little one said, "But Gramma, you forgot to kiss the toilet paper good-bye!" I will probably never put lipstick on again without thinking about kissing the toilet paper good-bye...

2. My young grandson called the other day to wish me Happy Birthday. He asked me how old I was, and I told him, 62. My grandson was quiet for a moment, and then he asked, "Did you start at 1?"

3. After putting her grandchildren to bed, a grandmother changed into old slacks and a droopy blouse and proceeded to wash her hair. As she heard the children getting more and more rambunctious, her patience grew thin. Finally, she threw a towel around her head and stormed into their room, putting them back to bed with stern warnings. As she left the room, she heard the three-year-old say with a trembling voice, "Who was THAT?"

4. A grandmother was telling her little granddaughter what her own childhood was like: "We used to skate outside on a pond. I had a swing made from a tire, and it hung from a tree in our front yard. We rode our pony. We picked wild raspberries in the woods." The little girl was wide-eyed, taking this all in. At last she said, "I sure wish I'd gotten to know you sooner!"

5. My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo and I said, "No, how are we alike?'' "You're both old," he replied.

6. A little girl was diligently pounding away on her grandfather's word processor. She told him she was writing a story. "What's it about?" he asked. "I don't know," she replied. "I can't read."

7. I didn't know if my granddaughter had learned her colors yet, so I decided to test her. I would point out something and ask what color it was. She would tell me, and was always correct. It was fun for me, so I continued. At last, she headed for the door, saying, "Grandma, I think you should try to figure out some of these, yourself!"

8. When my grandson Billy and I entered our vacation cabin, we kept the lights off until we were inside to keep from attracting pesky insects. Still, a few fireflies followed us in. Noticing them before I did, Billy whispered, "It's no use Grandpa. Now the mosquitoes are coming after us with flashlights."

9. When my grandson asked me how old I was, I teasingly replied, "I'm not sure." "Look in your underwear, Grandpa," he advised, "mine says I'm 4 to 6."

10. A second grader came home from school and said to her grandmother, "Grandma, guess what? We learned how to make babies today." The grandmother, more than a little surprised, tried to keep her cool. "That's interesting," she said, "how do you make babies?" "It's simple," replied the girl. "You just change 'y' to 'i' and add 'es'."

11. Children's Logic: "Give me a sentence about a public servant," said a teacher. The small boy wrote: "The fireman came down the ladder pregnant." The teacher took the lad aside to correct him. "Don't you know what pregnant means?" she asked. "Sure," said the young boy confidently. It means carrying a child."

12. A grandfather was delivering his grandchildren to their home one day when a fire truck zoomed past. Sitting in the front seat of the fire truck was a Dalmatian dog. The children started discussing the dog's duties. "They use him to keep crowds back," said one child. "No," said another. "He's just for good luck." A third child brought the argument to a close. "They use the dogs," she said firmly, "to find the fire hydrants."

13. A 6-year-old was asked where his grandma lived. "Oh," he said, "she lives at the airport, and when we want her, we just go get her. Then, when we're done having her visit, we take her back to the airport."

14. Grandpa is the smartest man on earth! He teaches me good things, but I don't get to see him enough to get as smart as him!

15. My grandparents are funny. When they bend over, you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog.

HANDBOOK 2010

Health:

1. Drink plenty of water.

2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.

3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants.

4. Live with the 3 E's -- Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy

5. Make time to pray.

6. Play more games

7. Read more books than you did in 2009 .

8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day

9. Sleep for 7 hours.

10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:

11. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.

12. Don't have negative thoughts or things you cannot control.. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.

13. Don't over do. Keep your limits.

14. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.

15. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip.

16. Dream more while you are awake

17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..

18. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner with his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.

19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.

20. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present.

21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.

22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.

23. Smile and laugh more.

24. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree...

Society:

25. Call your family often.

26. Each day give something good to others.

27. Forgive everyone for everything.

28. Spend time w/people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6.

29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.

30. What other people think of you is none of your business.

31. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:

32. Do the right thing!

33. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful to you. Don't listen to what others think you should/shouldn't keep.

34. GOD heals everything.

35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change..

36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.

37. The best is yet to come.

38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank GOD for it.

39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

Last but not the least:

40. Please forward this to everyone you care about. I received this in a email from my cousin, Mary Lee. I'm not one to forward a lot emails, but thought this was worth sharing!

The 12 Days of Christmas

The real meaning of the 12 days of Christmas


There is one Christmas Carol that has always baffled me. What in the world do leaping lords, French hens, swimming swans, and especially the partridge who won't come out of the pear tree have to do with Christmas?

This week, I found out.

From 1558 until 1829, Roman Catholics in England were not permitted to practice their faith openly. Someone during that era wrote this carol as a catechism song for young Catholics. It has two levels of meaning: the surface meaning plus a hidden meaning known only to members of their church. Each element in the carol has a code word for a religious reality which the children could remember.

-The partridge in a pear tree was Jesus Christ.

-Two turtle doves were the Old and New Testaments.

-Three French hens stood for faith, hope and love.-

-The four calling birds were the four gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke & John.

-The five golden rings recalled the Torah or Law, the first five books of the Old Testament.

-The six geese a-laying stood for the six days of creation.

-Seven swans a-swimming represented the sevenfold gifts of the Holy Spirit--Prophesy, Serving, Teaching, Exhortation, Contribution, Leadership, and Mercy.

-The eight maids a-milking were the eight beatitudes.

-Nine ladies dancing were the nine fruits of the Holy Spirit--Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control.

-The ten lords a-leaping were the ten commandments.

-The eleven pipers piping stood for the eleven faithful disciples.

-The twelve drummers drumming symbolized the twelve points of belief in the Apostles' Creed.

So there is your history for today. This knowledge was shared with me and I found it interesting and enlightening and now I know how that strange song became a Christmas Carol... so I pass it on.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

ADVENT

What is Advent?

Long before Jesus was born, the world was preparing for Him. Prophets and holy people of the Old Testament explained that God loved mankind, and that one day God Himself would come to show men exactly what love meant. Men and women waited and prepared for His arrival which came at the first Christmas.
Advent begins four Sundays before Christmas. It is a season which represents the years in which the world was preparing for the coming of the Son of God. We use those weeks to prepare ourselves to celebrate His joyful birthday. At Christmas we want Him to be born once more in our hearts.
What is an Advent Wreath?
An Advent Wreath is a circle of evergreens with three purple candles and one rose candle around its edge and a fifth white candle in the center. Each part of the wreath has a special meaning.
The circular wreath has no beginning and no end. It serves as a reminder that God has no beginning and no end. He lived before there was a world; He lives in Jesus: He lives now and always will live.
The wreath is made of evergreens. They stay green all year never losing their needles. Since they are always alive, they are a reminder that people who love God will not only live their lives now, but will live eternally with Him.
The candles represent the four weeks in Advent. One candle is lighted the first Sunday in Advent and an additional one each Sunday thereafter. Candles are burned to give light. The additional one is lighted each week to show that the light of Jesus’ love and joy is shining brighter into the darkness of hatred and evil the nearer we come to His birthday. Finally on Christmas Eve, the white candle is lighted to show that the light of Jesus Christ has come into the world. Purple is the Church’s color for penitence and preparation. The fourth candle is rose for joy (lit the 3rd week). The white candle is the Church’s color for purity.
Suggested bible passages, prayers and songs are read and sung each week as the appropriate candles are lit.
I have my own Advent wreath at home that I have used for many years. This has always made the Christmas season more meaningful for me.
Christmas is a time to enjoy God's presence more than presents!

Thanksgiving Gratitude

Thanksgiving is almost here!

I have soooo many blessings and gratitudes that it would be hard to name them all!

I've already posted pictures of all my family and I'm looking forward to being with them and enjoying Thanksgiving in Colorado.

The security at the airport is always a challenge.
I'm just grateful that I'm able to go and get through it!

• As I reflect on my many blessings I must put my Lord and Savior at the top of that list, because of Him I am grateful for who I am and the life I am leading.... able to enjoy each day as I grow older and closer to Him. I'm so thankful for His love and sacrifice for me.
• Being here with Deb and Ron is a special blessing. I'm able to work at The Silver Hanger as well as help in whatever other ways I can. My last project before leaving for Thanksgiving was to send out 600 emails for the upcoming sale at The Silver Hanger.... only 80 of them bounced back:)!
• I enjoy being with my Senior friends at church and Bible study as well as other activities we do. I am blessed to be part of a church where the Bible is taught and preached. Placing my faith in the power of God, I am safe, secure and protected.
• I enjoy good health even with all my bionic parts:)! With the exception of a couple small prescription pills, I only take vitamin supplements. Actually, I got a good report after my annual routine exams in the past couple months with the primary care doctor, eye doctor, dentist and dermatologist.
• I give thanks for this Thanksgiving Day as a day of peace, a day of oneness, a day of celebration and a day of love. I am blessed beyond measure and wish all this for all my friends and family!

Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18